Hey all you Ladies and Moms, 
I need a bunch of prayers coming my way to help me with the final stretch of something I've been trying to do since I left.  I was so upset about leaving both of the girls but especially L...knowing that I would miss so many milestones.  I was also very upset that I would have to stop breastfeeding much earlier than I wanted to and 4 months earlier than the recomended "at least a year" that the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends to help boost immunity and to decrease the chances of many childhood and adult diseases like obesity, diabetes, allergies/asthma, and various cancers.  So in my grieving of all that I would be missing out on with L I sort of grabbed ahold of the breastfeeding and thought that if I could somehow continue to get her breastmilk until at least a year I could put myself back in control and remove one thing from the growing list of "what L and I would be missing".  So I became determined (maybe obsessed is a better way to word it) to see if there was any way for L to keep breastfeeding until a year (don't worry, I'm not looking for wet nurses!)  I was able to pump and freeze enough extra milk throughout her early infancy to last the first two months that I was gone, and I've continued pumping and freezing since I left.  It's been very hard, logistically, as I had to "pump and dump" for the 5 days until I got here, and I've had to figure out where to stash the frozen milk, wash the pump parts, etc.  My supply has dwindled quite a bit, but over the past 7 weeks I pumped and froze 60 6ounce bags which will get us 1 month closer to that 1 year goal if I can just get it to the states.  There is a DHL here on base that said they'll "try" to keep it in a cool part of the plane and it should make it to Maryland in 2-3 days.  So, yesterday the cooler that I ordered finally arrived and I modified it a bit with some added styrofoam to the lid and bubble wrap around the inside.  I packed up my milk this morning and jogged (carrying a 30 pound cooler) 1/2 a mile to the DHL and got a shoulder shrug when I asked if they thought it would arrive frozen.  We have no dry ice or anything here so I'm just praying that all of the frozen bags packed together will keep each other mostly frozen.  I just need all of you to send ice cold thoughts my way in hopes that this milk will get to L still frozen.  It's probably a silly thing to cling to but despite the hassle that pumping/washing/freezing brings it has made me continue to feel like a mom and if this crazy plan works out I can at least let go of some of the guilt that I am carrying about being away from such a young baby.  And if it doesn't work out, I'll at least know that I did absolutely everything that I could to make it work, it's out of my hands now.  It's funny because I didn't realize how huge of a deal it was to me as I got into the routine of pumping/washing, etc. until I actually handed the cooler over to the guy that looked at me like I was crazy...."you're sending what?!"  I am now all wound up worrying about this liquid gold that I've spent 7 weeks laboring over.  So please keep my shipment in your thoughts/prayers and in a few days you'll get an update.  I tell you what, being a mother is much harder than any other job that I've ever, or ever will have! 
  
Thanks for listening girls,